58 Things I Learned While Being Home Alone: Nos. 29-20

We’ve made it to the teens! I say “we’ve” because a small part of me feels like you have all played a part in my journey. Call it the Fellowship of the … Kevin’s Loneliness? I don’t know. I watched LOTR: The Fellowship of the Ring for the first time since it appeared on the big screen so I have Frodo and the rest of the posse on my mind.

Yes! We’ve made it to the final two weeks of this journey, and as I mentioned – SPOILER ALERT! – in No. 18, two weeks doesn’t seem that long after making it through six. People still gasp when I tell them I have two weeks remaining but I tell them that it feels like I’m on a bike riding downhill. I’m halfway to the bottom of the hill and then it’ll all smooth out!

You single folks are probably thinking, “Smooth out?! What are you crazy?! Kids screaming! Wife to answer to! How do you smooth out with all that?” And I counter that with, “How many times do you get to have sex in a month?” That’s what I thought! I’ll take the screaming kids and wife to answer to just so I can trump you by three or four nights and less time in between. OK … I apologize, as you can tell it’s been 40 days and … let’s get to Nos. 29-20 shall we?!

#29 – Half empty? Half full? Either way I’m halfway there!

Not much to explain there! I was halfway there! I had made it to the top of the hill and … you know the rest.

#28 – That the Summer Olympics will start and finish before Lis and the kids come back. 58 days is a long, long time!

I saw more of Michael Phelps than I saw of my own family the last 10 days! Granted, he’s an amazing swimmer, is exciting to watch and has a nice body, but still the Olympics are starting and ending before the family leaves Brazil?! Not cool! Oh and … U-S-A! U-S-A!

#27 – I don’t really know where anything in my house is!

Do you know how many times I wished I could call or text my wife to ask her where something was? I can’t even count the times I spun around in the garage wondering where the heck she keeps the broom, or how many times I spun around the kitchen wondering where we keep our plastic containers! I should’ve gone through a training course before she ditched me.

#26 – Port Townsend, Port Gamble and a couple of ferry rides make a nice day trip!

It’s Saturday afternoon and I’m cleaning up my office when my good buddy, the Big Dog, calls. His plans fell through and wanted to know if I’d join him on a trip to the peninsula and the Jefferson County Relay for Life. Sounds great! So the two of us spent some QT (Quality Time) on a two-hour trip to Port Townsend. One thing good when you’re traveling with a DJ. You always get good music on the radio!

I had never been to the peninsula before, thus my surprisement – that’s not a word – when we drove through the beautiful town of Port Gamble. All the houses look like they were built in the early 1900’s and they have all remained that way, except well maintained. It felt like going back into time. Very cool! I thought about how cool it’d be to take Lis and the kids over on a ferry and visit the small town. Port Townsend was nice as well and their Relay, though small in comparison to ours, was enjoyable. We reconnected with the Jefferson County Committee, who we met at Summit, and with our new ACS Staff Partner.

Thanks Jerry for the date! I had a good time!

#25 – I really haven’t missed watching “20/20“, “Criminal Minds“, “48 Hours Mystery” or any other show that Lis loves but causes me nightmares and sprints down the hallway.

It’s true! I have not missed those shows one bit. Lis loves them. It’s a Saturday night and she’ll be watching some real-life murder mystery. I don’t want to watch it but the story is so intriguing that I get hooked and hours later I’m waking up with my chest pounding because I thought someone was in our house stealing my babies!

What have I been watching instead? Well if you’ve paid attention to my blog, you’ll know that I’m catching up on ESPN’s “30 for 30” documentaries. When I lay in bed at night I’ve been watching my 10 seasons of “Friends“, “The Big Lebowski” and “Scrubs“. Things I can put on at night that won’t give me nightmares and won’t keep me awake at night. So there!

#24 – I think it’s time to start cooking. Kinda getting tired of frozen meals for lunch.

OK … so it’s been a week since I posted this and I still haven’t cooked anything. I’ve been blessed with good family and friends that have either made me food or invited me over for dinner. Still, I’m out of frozen dinners so that means it’s time to reintroduce myself to pasta making!

#23 – I can finally say, with excitement, MY FAMILY WILL BE HOME THIS MONTH!

It was August 1. They’ll be home August 22. ‘Nuff said.

#22 – Never underestimate the power of Youth Group.

I co-lead my church’s Youth Group. It’s disorganized. It’s confusing. It takes time out of my day or night. I complain to Lis about it every Wednesday afternoon. But you know what? Often it’s a blast! And most importantly, what I’ve realized is that the kids need me and I need them. Oh, and that I need to stop complaining about it.

The day that I posted this we spent time at the Gold Bar Nature Trails hanging out, playing basketball in the pool, eating and walking around the Nature Trails doing a scavenger hunt. I had a great time! The kids like me because … well I’m not sure why. I like them because it allows me to be young. It allows me to hopefully be a positive influence or example in their lives. I played basketball with three of the high school boys and for the scavenger hunt I was the “adult” leader of the middle schoolers. We talked, we laughed, and you know what? We won! I told my group that if they won I would buy them ice cream. I didn’t think we’d win. But we did!

Oh and we came up with a new slogan, “Life’s hard. Eat mustard.”

#21 – I think it’s time to start weaning myself back into “Married Kevin” life.

The origins of “Married Kevin” come from my ACS Staff Partner, Kelly and the aforementioned Big Dog. They labeled me “Married Kevin” at the ACS Summit last October, as if to warn people, “He doesn’t get out much.” And I kind of proved that point at Summit.

Well for the first time ever I used it on myself.

It’s time to get back into the “Married Kevin” routine. No more late nights with my friends. No more going out on weekdays. It was time to prepare the house for Lis’s return. It’s time to relax and stop filling my schedule with activities. It was time to return to “Married Kevin”. And you know what? I kind of prefer “Married Kevin”.

#20 – A sparkling clean bathroom makes me want to hold it.

Let’s clear this up. When I posted this my sister-in-law thought “hold it” meant holding the toilet. Like I was sick to my stomach and needed to grab onto the toilet. Hehe! What I meant was that I had just cleaned both bathrooms, the toilet bowls sparkled and now I needed to use the bathroom. Except that I didn’t want to use the bathroom. The toilets were clean! Why ruin that so soon?! I wanted to escape to the backyard or the side of the house and relieve myself … one second, all this peeing talk makes me have to go … OK, I’m back, where was I?

I spent all Saturday washing dishes, doing three loads of laundry, vacuuming and cleaning the bathrooms. It felt so good. So good that I thought, “Hmm, why can’t I do this when Lis is here?” Could these 58 days have changed my life? To be continued …


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